28 December 2010

Moving to the new year

So far this had been yet another bad year for me. I had been under the thought that I had friends over here, but then, many strange things struck me hard enough. First of all, I lost in my dramas. My D-Zone drama was a failure. Have to blame myself for being more a director and less an actor on stage. But my team mates too didn't take it seriously. For them it was just a game, while for me it was a life time opportunity. In other words, they failed me.
I lost in arts too. Got a second because of one man's callous behavior. I am still upset about it, because if I had got it right, things would have gone in a far better fashion.
I thought my department was with me when they supported me throughout arts. But when I went for D-Zone, I realized that the support was because at arts I was the only one representing them in English drama. Once it was done, they needed me no longer. At a moment when I need lot support, I got none at D-Zone. Happy to know that I have no friends over there. So, as I thought in the beginning of my engineering life, I have made no friends.
A person who I thought was a good friend betrayed me not just in my love life, but also in case of my other friends too. Many think I am the worst choice they could opt because of that one man. Glad to know that everyone has broken up with me not just because I am different, but because of the image he had made of me. The sad part is…I am fucking alone.
The present outcome is, I have decided to not to continue engineering. I will finish the course, but not go through the supples after college. I rather go through what I want, because, no one wants me to do so. I want to live my life.
Scared and worried about falling in love, because P@#$%^&* has been lot for me. She just didn't see it. Now I don't care. Love and I will never go together.
Friends...I rather leave them here. I may be victorious, or I may lose and die as such. They will praise or ditch me respectively. But none will be with me. So let they be here.
And why I say this here, for two reasons. One that I am stepping on to a new year, where I am desperate to make some friends, fall in love and make a new face of myself. I know that none will happen, but still, what if....
And secondly....because I am sure no body will be reading this. So far, that's what has been happening to my blog.

07 October 2010

Just from my heart

I was learning everything about myself for the past two days, when I was alone in my room, thinking about the drama, which again has a chance to drop away. Did I mention my dance drama being pulled out by a mother-fucking man who always walks around with a tie? Sorry for my language, just can't help it.
Talking about me, I was going round about that one girl. She...the angel, the blossoming flower of the garden in my hearty. She thinks I am loser. A year ago, a friend of mine successfully made her believe it ever since I made one mistake. The gravest mistake was in trusting him.
Why am I saying this now? For one simple reason, that I have realized a cruel part about love. She hates me in all sense. And why...because she has failed to see me.
What is essential in a relationship? Mutual understanding. That was why I was craving for love. but it seems like....love is not the essential thing. When a person is your mate, he/she wants to point you to their friends and say, "Look at that person. He/She is cool in such a way."
People want to be with those who have proved their worth. Is their truth in such a relationship? I don't think so. Consider the way I think, I'll reach somewhere only after long time. If someone comes into my life now, it will be someone who can understand me deeply. After being successful, there is no point in having a person in your life, for deceit overcomes love at such states. Rarely love comes at such states.
Finding a mate before being someone is thus essential for me. But now, she sees not me but my faults. And foolish me...I can not fall for someone else I have fallen so much for her. It is not love as they say, it is foolishness. And I am still in that transient state where I just don’t know anything else apart from her. What is the use of such a state?
One day...she will know. It will be too late by then. And I will be alone forever, for till date, I've never fund anyone who could replace her, ever.
Nobody wants to be with a loser. And nobody wants to be with a lover. Everyone wants to be with a person who they can show out to the society and say, "This is my guy/gal."
No offense to the lovers outside. I am simply mad today. And I just want to say to you...you may be in love. I am only typing my feelings. And I am not drunk, but quite crazy....Silly me!!!

11 September 2010

At a confused state

I am actually very much confused. First of all, my new semester has begun, and to be frank, me team mate is killing me, telling things I can never understand. But since it is his dream, and since he is in our team (well, we're actually in his team) I am obliged to be with him. What is in a dazed state are the below things.

First of all, the drama "India Before And After Independence" is at a far away state since the principal has no mind in helping the team. But at least this time many of the faculties are with us. The canvasing program over the first years (and if not adequate, second years too) will be done in a period of two weeks. Don't know where it is going to. Hope for the best though.

Second is about the drama we are proposing for D Zone. Apart from me, only one more has read the drama in our team. She liked it, and I have added one more scene. This version hasn't been read by any. And we have stat with the audition works too, but that too happens to be uncertain, again due to the major project and the Principal. Again hope for the best.

The main worry is that my thumbs are going numb over UGLY. I just am not getting the right words for it anymore,. maybe because of this course I am attending. I don't think I will be able to do it as I used to. But will have to work hard on it too. The same goes with THE THIEF.

Presently am reading Paulo Coelho's The Winner Stand Alone. Frankly....it is scaring me, showing the truth behind the show business. Anyways, it is very interesting too.

I want you guys to pray for me. I want to do things right this year.

P. S. I also want you guys to pray for me to get that one girl I really like. Only if you have time though. Major prayers for the above sessions are what I really need.

Have a nice month everyone.

25 August 2010

Lady In Pink

Well....the good news is that I finished my new short story. It was a bit of hard work, and I am happy with it. It is a love story, and a good touch, I would say. Here is a small abstract from it.

He looked ahead of them to see the little squirrels play. He saw a little baby cry. He saw a little girl run between the legs of her parents. He saw a world in that park.
He looked down at his hands and waved it around. A tiny spark appeared, but it suddenly disappeared. That wasn’t enough. He had to apply more power to himself. But the energy was getting harder for him, so he simply stopped it there and looked ahead.
The little girl started running to the other side of the park. He watched her carefully, when a branch of tree suddenly fell over the girl, pushing her down to the ground with her blood all around.
A sudden reaction was all over Harvey, and he looked again, at the girl who had started to run to the other side of the park. And without his permission, his hands moved.
A little stone suddenly started to roll and stood on the way of the little girl. And she stepped on it at once. Next minute she tripped and fell forward, and the huge branch fell right behind her.
Her mother suddenly screamed and ran to the spot, to watch her daughter just after the branch, hurt only on the hand due to the fall.
Everyone else ran to the spot, trying to see the very lucky girl. The mother was holding her baby and crying with relief. And it was time for Harvey to go.

21 July 2010

A quick note to say

Been long since I have been here, so let me give a few updates. I am now busy with my S6 examination, so stories will have to wait. To be frank, I had been quite slow on my writings for the past two months.

And yes, instead of Jewish Girl, I have decided to write another story named Ugly, because there is a lot more that I have to research before typing it down. Also am thinking about rewriting I am Kalki Part 1 Formation of Kalki. The decision have not been made yet.

Also specks for two new short stories are roaming around, which I will pen down soon enough. By the way, I have a drama for D Zone this year, English, and I am trying to play The Passion Of Valentine for the day. And the big dance drama is still way ahead, just a bit slow due to my examination and lesser participation. I can not reveal much about it, since it needs a lot of work. So...here I am perplexed at every step. Funny!!!

26 May 2010

5 phases with her

This is a short story, which I felt was good indeed. I had the idea for about a month or two, but penned it down in one morning alone. And supposedly...it has turned out to be good. It is the story of a man and his five important phases with a girl, the love of his life. Here is a small part from it.

So after the ravaging one month, I was set. It was all me, I didn’t have much friends in there, so I had to make my move alone. And so…the date was also set, September 23rd.
Evening. She was standing with her friends. I watched her slowly. She was standing outside the college perimeter, talking to her friends while licking her orange flavored ice-stick. Oh lucky ice-stick!
I walked to her. With her back in front of me, I stood behind her, admiring her hair. She was the prettiest, even when we don’t see her face. Maybe I was the only one to think so.
What I had to say? Hi! My name is Jeff, Jeff Patterson. Do you want a chocolate? My mamma says that life is like a box of…Oh my! I wasn’t Forrest!
My name is Jeff Patterson. Fine student in Computers, 2nd year, son to a working father…I wasn’t Maximus either!
I was formulating and was about to talk, when she suddenly turned and I got a kiss from her melting ice-stick. In an instant, my white t-shirt turned yellow, or orange.
Now…whatever I was feeling for her, it was overcome by anger. That too suddenly. She was scared, and looked at me apologetically, and I suddenly screamed, “What the fucking hell were you thinking when you turned?”
That was a great start. She tried to speak, “I…I’m sorry…but...”
“Sorry! Will that help me clean my shirt? What the fuck were you thinking, you stinky bitch?” Now that was the limit.
She couldn’t bear it anymore. “One minute, Mr. Senior! You were the one sticking up your bloody dick behind me without me noticing it a bit at all. What do you have to say about that you…you…?”
That was the end of the conversation, for I couldn’t say a word to her anymore. And we quarreled all way long.
That was how I met her.

15 April 2010

Hey dudes...I did it

At last, after all my hard work, I've successfully completed one of the most challenging stories of my life. And I'm quite satisfied at the result, I believe it is readable now. I shall have 'Aspects of Life' in pdf soon enough.

Mean while, I have fallen into the next sessions. This year,. I'll be typing two novels. One happens to be a love story (as how I felt it is). I call it Jewish girl. The second happens to be an action novel, more appropriate to be a graphic novel, but you see, I am not an artist. So...The Thief is an action novel.

Also two new short stories are coming ahead....5 phases with her and Love in air. I'll have them done soon, by May. Don't know what else is ahead now, short stories come just like a jiff, so...am not planned about them.

07 April 2010

Aspects of Life

Aspects of Life is a new novel which is about the life of Alex and Rose, and how it changes in the various phases of life. I have completed it, and now set to be read. This was inspired from my own life, to be frank. It is one entertaining thoughtful story, and here is one small excerpt from it.



Alex entered the room and looked around. There was a bed over which was the window that opened to the garden below. At the corner was table lamp, and near to that was a writing table. There was also a nice chair present.
“Do you want any drink…or something to eat, Alex?” asked Martin Alex replied, “No! I’m good. I just want to be alone.”
“The function is at 8. So…what’s your range….18 or more?”
Alex looked at him. He knew what he meant. He laughed and replied, “I have a girl. And she is more than enough to trouble me. And yes…I need the time.”
Martin smiled and replied, “In that case, let me take my leave, Alex. I have some works to do.” He walked to the door. Before closing the door, he said, “Your girl is very lucky to have you. Actually, you are one of a kind.”
Alex simply smiled. As he went away, he went and locked the door and looked back into the room. It was much as how he wanted. He sat on the chair with his head bent backwards. And he thought at once. Actually, you are one of a kind.
He thought for once. “Am I one of a kind? Am I the one they are looking for? When I look back in my life, I find myself nothing else other than a fool, a loser…a dreamer.”
With his closed eyes, he could see them. Rose bent forward to look at his closed eyes. Mr. and Mrs. Robertson smiled at him together. Billy turned his head away. Gillian walked away. Sarah simply laughed. And Ellen walked towards him.

14 February 2010

Completed stories in pdf format

Hey guys....here I'm back again. I'm here to tell you that some of my completed works are now available in pdf format. I'm going to put them down here. If you are really interested in reading any of them, please let me know, either through orkut, or through mail, or even here as a comment. Aside...also put your email id for the convenience of sending.....Just make sure that it doesn't go off hands....The copyright will be mine alone.

Novels

1. I Am Kalki Part 1-Formation of Kalki
2. Killer X
3. What I Felt Part 1-The Story
4. Aspects of Life

Short Stories

1. Joanna
2. 5 phases with her

Dramas

1. The passion of Valentine
2. India before and after independence
3. Confessions of a criminal

Short Film Scripts

1. Sophie
2. Bunch of roses
3. Few bottles and a smile




And these are my projects for next year
The Thief-Novel-Due next April
Jewish Girl-Due next May

04 February 2010

Joanna

This is a short story, which I ought to complete soon. And here is the first chapter. Frankly speaking, I still don't know how the idea got into me. But it feels great, and so I have the first chapter for all.

1. Confrontation


She crawled more back when she saw them move towards her. She didn’t scream, nor did she cry. But she was certain in the steps she made, even when she moved silently. And the four men eyed her in the way no one would, with eyes that were crueler than ever
“It will be a great day for you, I promise.” said one among them, who had a smile wider than that of others, “Just let us have you, and we will give you heaven.” The vive was small, but inside the tunnel, it was big.
“Cut the crap, Sam!” snapped a bearded man with them, “Someone may come.”
“No one will come here, Brad! No one.” said the third guy, with just a moustache.
“But it is safe to finish it off right now.” Brad was tensed. He may have never done it in an alley.
Sam looked at him, and then at the girl, who was not more than 23. She was still cornered. He smiled and said, “Alright then! We will do it in the hard way.” She looked at her bag, which was a distance away. He smiled and said, “We will get you cleaned, don’t worry about it. Just cooperate. Brad! You first.”
Brad smirked and walked towards her. Her eyes were rigid. The other three smiled and walked to the turn, to enjoy only the sounds.
For a minute they waited, for a sound, a cry or a series of panting. But there was nothing for a moment. And suddenly they heard a scream…of Brad!
They didn’t understand what was going on. They ran back to the turn, to watch out what had happened.
The lady was standing, and she held a screw driver. The pointed edge was in his neck, and he wasn’t able to make further noise. She pulled it out and watched him fall, and with blood soaked eyes, watched the other three, shocked in disbelief. And then, she was smiling.

My name is Joanna. I am 23. I am beautiful and blonde. And I let no men near me. My name is Joanna. I am scared of men, everyone to be precise, for they never look into my eyes. And I see them, right into their eyes, read what they want, and give it accordingly.
This isn’t the first time. I had started when I was 10. I am never scared to fight; my only fear is of losing. I don’t know if it is right or wrong, all I know is that what I am doing is right for me now.
My name is Joanna. I am a criminal.


She watched the last man struggle and stop beneath her legs. She watched him silently, and wiped off the blood on the screw driver and looked around. She then pulled the body and took it back to the tunnel.
Soon the four bodies were placed one over the other inside the deep tunnel. She didn’t hesitate further. She stripped off her blood soaked clothes. In the coldness, she stood bare skin, and placed her clothes over them.
She moved to her bag and took put a small bottle filled with some inflammable liquid. She poured it whole on them, and then lit a fire by her lighter. She watched them burn.
The meat didn’t bother her. She took out her clothes from the bag and then moved out of the tunnel, to the river, to take a bathe.

What makes a criminal?
Greed. Ambition. Fear. Want.
What kills a criminal?
Revenge.



P.S. I have finished the whole story. If anyone wants it, please send me your email ID, and I shall send the whole story, Joanna

29 January 2010

The Passion of Valentine

This is actually a drama of the big novel I'm planning to write in near future. I didn't know how it worked, but many liked it. The plan is to set this on stage ion the upcoming Arts Day. Hope everyone like it then. Here is a small excerpt from the drama.

Curtain rises. A court room is shown on stage. Roman Emperor Claudius II and four of the senate members sit on the royal chair. The murmurs of the mob can be heard. Everyone becomes silent when two Roman soldiers come in with a priest with beard. He is pushed to the middle of the stage. Murmurs rise again. One of the priests raises his hand, and everyone becomes silent. He walks towards the bearded priest.

Priest 1: Good morning, Father Valentine. It is a pleasure to see you here. (Valentine smiles.) Do you know why you have been brought here?
Valentine: (Laughs) If I knew all answers, I would have been God.
Priest 1: Then I shall ask you some questions, of which I deserve to know some answers. (Looks back at the Emperor, and then to the mob.) The whole of Rome had heard at once, that to make strong men remain as such, to create a strong army, marriage was a sin of break. Young men were not allowed to marry by the rule of the Great Claudius.
Valentine: I had heard that one.
Priest 2: And despite of that, you conducted secret marriages. Is that true?
Valentine: By the Almighty’s grace, yes, it is true.

Murmurs heard around. The third priest rises and raises his hand, and the murmurs stop.

Priest 3: Answer me, Valentine! Did you or did you not make the siblings fall in something so called…love?
Valentine: No. They were in love. And I showed them how to be together.
Priest 1: That is a lie. You made them walk through the wrong path.
Valentine: They never felt it was wrong. And so do I believe that it was never wrong.
Priest 4: (Stands) And so do you believe that you have made a royal move by this mistake? (Silence) Don’t you have an answer?
Valentine: I don’t have an answer that suits you.

Murmurs heard again.

Priest 4: I also heard that you are referred to as friends of lovers. Do you have anything to say about that?
Valentine: They were young. They wanted to be together. Their love was stronger than the law of the weak. And so I was with them, as a friend.
Priest 3: Don’t you regret.
Valentine: No…I don’t.
Priest 1: Tell me, Valentine! Don’t you now realize the aftermath of the great sin you have committed. People have disgraced their king because of you. People have disrespect for the senate. All what was decided here was for the right of the people. And you made them move through the wrong path of life. Do you have any justification for that?

Claudius rises.

Claudius: I give you a chance, my friend Valentine. You are guiltily by law. Admit it in front of the mob around you, and you shall be pardoned. You shall be sentenced and nothing more. But mark your words properly, for any wrong word may cause the blade over your neck.

Valentine looks up at him. He then walks two steps ahead and looks at the mob.

Valentine: A confession it is I make today. Yes, I did. I did break the rule. Yes, I did. I did get them married. Yes, I did, I helped them be together. And to be guilty…no…I’m not guilty.

The mob almost screams. Claudius stares at them angrily.

Claudius: (Stands and screams) Enough of this joke. (To the priests.) I have made my mind. He has to be punished. (To Valentine.) Father Valentine. You are found guilty of breaking the rules made by the ruler of the country. And so, I hereby sentence you to imprisonment for the next 50 years.
Valentine: Very well, King. Let that be able to stop love.